Red

Film/DVD

Bruce Willis, Morgan Freeman, Helen Mirren and John Malkovich. Now that is a great sounding cast.

I did actually start off writing about the various ways the characters are spending their lives but frankly it’s better for us all if I just tell you they are retired. And bored.

Based on the graphic novel the story centres around Frank Moses (Willis) who we learn was as hard as they come but has lately developed a soft spot for the pension services lady (Mary-Louise Parker) he speaks to each week on the phone.

We are sucked into an adventure which sees Willis team up with his old friends (Freeman, Malkovich and Mirren) where plenty of action is peppered with a few casually written one-liners as he attempts to save and impress the girl, stay alive, and generally enjoy himself.

In case you are still wondering, Red stands for ‘Retired, extremely dangerous’. So you know what you are going to get – a softer, cuddlier version of The Expendables.

The film is cute, harmless (despite the body-count and endless explosions), cheesy, and will at times raise a smile.

There is a decent soundtrack of well-known funky/motown hits that keeps the whole thing dancing along and accompanies the rather frequent montage sequences the likes of which you would find in Oceans Eleven.

I don’t want to be too harsh on this movie, as it doesn’t stink. It just doesn’t shine either. The stellar cast disappoint to a man, but you can’t really blame them. The script is weak, but you don’t care. The action sequences are fine…and since when do you want to call an action sequence fine!

My feeling is that if you find yourself at home and see that Red is on, for free, then why not let it wash over you. It is one of the least challenging films I have ever seen and wasn’t an unpleasant way to spend a couple of hours. Don’t pay for it though, that would be criminal.

4/10.  I fear this is possibly a little generous, but I’ll stick to it for now!